Lessons from Coach.

voddie-baucham The following is a heart-wrenching excerpt from Voddie Baucham’s book Family Driven Faith:

Over the years Coach and I have kept in contact. Every once in a while I pick up the phone and catch up with Coach. Recently I discovered that he had fallen on hard times. He had finally retired and didn’t know what to do with himself. What’s worse, his marriage of over twenty-five years had recently ended. At first I wondered what could possibly have gone wrong. Then it dawned on me. We saw a committed coach who arrived early every morning; his wife saw a man who was never home when she got up in the morning. We saw him as committed; she saw him as overextended. We saw him as a confidant who was always there for us; his children saw a man who was more of a father to strangers than he was to them. Now he spends his nights alone missing the woman who spent a quarter of a century missing him. He sits at home reminiscing about the house he was so committed to that he drove an hour to work every day rather than moving. He yearns for time with his kids, but that time is scarce because they are busy doing what he didn’t—spending time with their families. His days are spent with his elderly father, and occasionally he has a chance to watch his grandkids play ballgames, something I’m sure he wishes he had done more with his children. Every once in a while someone from the past calls and asks, “How’s it going, Coach?” A few minutes later the reminiscing is over, the voice from the past is gone, and Coach is alone with his memories. And all he has to show for it are a few trophies, a couple of pictures, and some patches on an old, faded jacket. I cried when I got off the phone that night. . . . All of the pictures came together, and I finally saw the truth that had been there all along. This man who had meant the world to me had sacrificed his family on the alter of his career, and I was oblivious to it. I considered it normal, even admirable. Suddenly, all these years later, I went from admiring Coach to feeling sorry for him. I saw the trade-off, and it wasn’t worth it. The occasional thanks of strangers will never dull the pain of years missed with your family. Needless to say, when I got off the phone with Coach, I spent some time with my kids. It turns out Coach still had lessons to teach.

2 thoughts on “Lessons from Coach.

  1. Powerful Truth from Pastor Voddie – no surprise. I just finished reading his latest book: “What he must be if he wants to marry my daughter”. Wow! A no compromise review of the Biblical teaching of parental responsibilities (and those of the children) in the arena of guarding our daughters by being involved in their emotional relationships before they get serious and standing firm on the requirement that the suitor be a true son of the living God.

    Perhaps the only book by man with which I find not one page to argue against. My only gripe is that this book was not available 10 years ago – my 21 year old daughter plans on marrying 15 months from now. I have a better idea of how I must relate to her suitor.


  2. Everytime I hear Voddie speak I go “wow”. Seriously. He hits the nail on the head nearly every time. It’s a sad fact that many sacrifice their family for their career. How sad that is. Why do people neglect such a wonderful blessing for something so superficial and meaningless such as career and vain ambition?

    The church needs the family back………….and Voddie is at the frontline of this battle. I really pray God changes the mindset of us Christians in the west. At least in America you guys still get married relatively young……..in the UK if you say you are getting married at 21,22 or even 25 people look at you as if you have got two heads!!! As a result vey few Christians get married at a gd age….instead we have bought into the lie of the culture that says its good to put off marriage “until we are ready” (by this they mean have a career, money, possessions etc). The result?? Lots of Christian guys and girls falling into sexual sin outside of marriage.

    Promoting the family and marriage has got to come from the pulpit and it needs to start being done more often (where it fits in with the sermon) because the only way we can stop the cultural water seeping into the church is by beginning to bail the water back out through the preaching of the word in the pulpit. As they say in soccer “If your good enough your young enough”………..that is if your ready for it and your only 18 then get married! If you play with the pigs you get mucky and unfortunately I think that we are letting many young people play with the pigs instead because we place getting a degree and pursuing a career as the main priority.

    To put it in Voddies language when he was at my church………….. “We in the Western church worship at the alter of Education”………..ouch!!….but true!!


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