Sermon of the week: “God’s view on Marriage and Divorce” by Akash Sant Singh.

If last week’s sermon on marriage by Albert Martin (found here) was a left hook, today’s message is an uppercut.

God’s view on marriage and divorce is a message that I strongly encourage DefCon readers to listen to whether you are married, divorced, widowed, or single (yes, that’s intended to be all-inclusive).

What a wonderfully convicting and encouraging message Akash brings from the book of Malachi. You won’t want to miss this one.

11 thoughts on “Sermon of the week: “God’s view on Marriage and Divorce” by Akash Sant Singh.

  1. Dear Readers,

    I would like to add my own recommendation for this message. This is probably one of the most powerful, hard-hitting messages for singles, married, and divorced believers. Pastor Akash is a good brother, and his message while hard-hitting is spoken in Christian love and grace. I believe you will be blessed to listen to this. You will also be edified and exhorted to a life of holiness in your relationships. Pilgrim, thanks for sharing.

    TJM

  2. papapatriot says:

    Great sermon. I have been divorced for three years now from a professing Christian wife, who cheated for the last 8 years of our marriage. I always forgave her for the infidelity and never threw her sin back in her face but loved her and cared for her. Even when she was in another country with her 5th man I told her that I would taken her back. In the end I filed for divorce, I know that I could remarry being not very old, even though my name here is Papa-patriot. I wander if I could have done more because she would never have Biblical grounds for remarriage.
    Have I condemned her life to singleness?

  3. PapaPatriot,

    First, it is always tragic when a marriage does not last, no matter what the circumstances. While it takes two to tango, the sad reality is that, more times than not, many are only willing to obey the commands of God provided they a) don’t “fall out of love” and/or b) they remain compatible. They forget that the covenant of marriage as pointed out so graciously by Pastor Akash is first to God, then before man. For the man, our love to our wife is to reflect to the world the relationship Jesus Christ has with His Bride. For the woman, her respect and commitment to obedience and submission is to be a direct reflection of the obedience and submission whereby she submits to the Lord. This is clearly evident from Ephesians 5 in both cases.

    Second, in many of our posts here at DefCon, we have sought to lovingly point out from Scripture what the Bible requires for one to be a true believer. For the person who chooses to remain in their sin and wickedness, there can be no evidence of fruit to repentance. This means that by your own profession, your ex-wife remained in continued infidelity with no stated remorse, godly sorrow, or repentance. While we cannot know her heart, we can judge a person by their fruit. In this case, the evidence is quite clear, we cannot say we love sin and also love God. We cannot call ourselves by the name of Jesus Christ if there is no conviction of sin, no true biblical repentance, and no desire to live a life of holiness.

    Third, I believe that from what you have written, you have shown great grace just as Hosea did with his wife, who lived continually as an harlot. He took her back over and over. I realize this was a picture of the relationship between God and the children of Israel who lived continuously in a state of adultery with the gods of the surrounding nations.

    Fourth, you make a comment of whether you have “condemned her life to singleness.” Dear brother, we must be careful that we do not assume responsibility that is not ours to assume. I do not find any Scripture that gives warrant for us to be responsible for the sins that others commit. in other words, a wife (or a husband) who chooses to leave over and over is the one that is committing adultery and infidelity. The remaining spouse is not responsible for their continued actions when that person refuses to repent and make things right. Yes, we are to help one another by bearing burdens and in so doing, fulfill the law of Christ. However, to assume that wanton, deliberate, willful, contemptuous acts of sin against a holy and righteous God have to be dealt with by that individual and the God they have offended. Only once that has taken place can any restitution take place between the offender and the offended.

    Fifth, I find only two reasons for divorce to take place. 1) For continued adultery, and 2) For desertion. When a person does either of these, Paul makes it clear in 1 Cor. 7 that the individual who has been offended is no longer bound by the law of their marriage. In the case where both 1 & 2 are a continual habit, a divorce is simply the paper acknowledgement of what has taken place long ago.

    Now, let me clarify. For two who are true believers in the Lord Jesus Christ, there is NO option for divorce. As Paul states in 1 Cor. 7 though, if one is not a believer, then the believing spouse can remain in that marriage as long as the unbelieving spouse remains. If the unbeliever deserts the believing spouse, again, the point is that there is nothing that binds the believer to remain in that marriage relationship. In fact, Paul goes further to state that by no longer being under the law of marriage, they are free to remarry if they so choose to do so.

    To conclude though, I would state that your ex-wife has made her choices. Your filing for divorce has made official to the eyes of the world what was already known by yourself and by God. She chose adultery and desertion which thus frees you to remarry if the Lord makes a way for you to do so. However, as Pastor Akash has stated, for a believer this means ONLY another true believer.

    As for your ex-wife, I believe that the only sin which will ultimately send a person to hell is the sin of unbelief. This means that your prayers and the prayers of others should be that God would break her heart and reveal Himself to her by His Holy Spirit. If she confesses her sins, humbles herself before God, repents and turns from her wicked ways, then the Bible is clear that she is just as forgiven as a person who was a drunk, a thief, a liar, a murderer, or whatever.

    Regarding your thoughts as to whether you did enough, Brother, only you can answer that before God. We do not know your situation and can only entrust you to the God we love that He will give you peace in your heart as to the results of your words and your actions. You cannot give consideration as to what your ex-wife can or cannot do and use that to make your decisions. In other words, you cannot remain a captive to her wickedness. If you believe you forgave her and have come to the point where you have extended final forgiveness (whether she has accepted that or not), then it must be left in God’s hands.

    I understand that there is obviously still a concern in your heart for her well-being. At least that is what we read in your comment. By way of further illustration, a person is a drunkard and in the process of drinking, they go out and have an accident. Due to that accident, they kill another human being and also lose an arm or a leg. Forgiveness by God and others will never bring that person back to life, nor will it grow another arm or leg. The person may even become a true believer, but they will always have to live with the knowledge of what they have done, and will always have to live with the loss of the arm or leg.

    Our prayer is that this will help clarify any questions you may have. If we have failed to address a point to your satisfaction, feel free to ask. We also pray that this may help somebody else at DefCon.

    Every blessing in Christ,

    TJM

  4. abidingthroughgrace says:

    Pilgrim, Thanks for posting this one. It is a wonderful message regarding the beauty of marriage as a picture of the gospel. Highly recommended.

    In Christ’s love,
    -atg

  5. papapatriot says:

    thejunglemissionary,
    Thank you for the post, I thought the worst when you asked if I wanted an off-line response.
    I have dealt with many a person and pastors who hold to no remarriage at all and have told me I would be committing adultery if I remarried. So I was ready to hear that again. :) As a Christian man and leader spiritually in my home, I was responsible for my wife and kids spiritual welfare. I know that everyone will bare there own sins. I guess that I will always wander if I could have done more. I do pray for her everyday.
    Thanks again for taking the time to respond

  6. brother Michael says:

    TJM – thanks so much for taking the time to write the detailed and gracious response you did. While addressed to parapatriot, it was very profitable to me and I’m certain many others.

    bro Michael

  7. PapaPatriot and Brother Michael, I am thankful to the Lord that this was a helpful explanation. Far too often through my years of ministry and being involved in church, I have found that those who have been divorced (no matter what the reason) are often ostracized and made to feel like 2nd or 3rd class citizens. If, as we believe, the Scriptures teach forgiveness of sins, and if Paul’s writing to the Corinthians is inspired by the Holy Spirit, then there does not appear to be any other logical conclusion which can be reached. Continuing to pray for those who have wronged us comes from a true spirit of forgiveness. If it was not for the grace of God, we could just as easily have found ourselves living in a gutter or abusing the covenants to which we promised God and others. Praise the Lord for His mercy, His grace, and His faithfulness. – TJM

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