30 Comments

You might be a Calvinist . . .

The following is from the Disciple Man blog:

You Might Just Be A Calvinist If….

If you have a Martin Luther Jell-O mold… you just might be a Calvinist.

If your DVR has over 25 episodes of Wretched With Todd Friel recorded on it… you just might be a Calvinist.

If your child’s first word was “Westminster”… you just might be a Calvinist.

If your 4 year old can explain what the word “propitiation” means… you might just be a Calvinist.

If you send your mother tulips on Mother’s Day… you might be a Calvinist.

If your passion for evangelism blows away your Arminian friends… you might just be a (true) Calvinist.

If you hate rap music BUT you listen to Lecrea, The Cross Movement, Flame or D.A. T.R.U.T.H. because of the lyrics and theology… you might be a Calvinist.

If quotes from Pink, Spurgeon, Luther, Piper, and McArthur make up 90% of your Facebook statuses…you might be a Calvinist.

If you still remember the 8 speakers in order from the recent T4G conference… you might be a Calvinist.

If you cringe every time you hear someone proclaim “God loves you and has a wonderful plan for your life! Choose Jesus!”… you might be a Calvinist.

If you’ve ever wanted to attend a Benny Hinn crusade just so you could stand up and shout “Ichabod!!”… you might just be a Calvinist.

If you purposefully read a book to be convicted… you might just be a Calvinist.

If a free Bible or book has ever arrived in the mail to you from John McArthur… you might be a Calvinist.

If you have to order theological books online because no one at the Christian bookstore has ever heard of them… you might just be a Calvinist.

If you have ever purchased 100 or more copies of the same John Piper book to hand out to random people you meet …you just might be a Calvinist.

If you ever have found yourself thinking “My pastor’s sermon was particularly Spurgeonesque this morning”… you just might be a Calvinist.

If you read “The Purpose Driven Life” just to see how bad the book really is… you might just be a Calvinist.

If you go to your bookshelf in search of a particular John MacArthur book only to discover that your 14 year old son is reading it up in his bedroom… you might just be a Calvinist.

If you purchased an MP3 player with the sole purpose of downloading sermons… you might be a Calvinist.

If you were shocked to just discover that some people download MP3 files that are not sermons… you might be a Calvinist.

If you have adjusted the default passage setting at www.biblegateway.org from “NIV” to “ESV” … you might be a Calvinist.

If while visiting friends or family’s homes you hid their copy of “The Shack” (for their own good)… you might just be a Calvinist.

If your preacher says to turn to Obadiah and you do not use the index… you might be a Calvinist.

If your teenagers are excited that your church’s youth group is learning Biblical theology and being spiritually challenged instead of playing stupid games and eating pizza…. you might just be a Calvinist.

If you think a 50-minute sermon is too short… you might be a Calvinist.

If you’ve ever heard a wave of groans sweep through Sunday School when you refer to Romans 9… you might be a Calvinist.

If you find yourself talking to the Lord Jesus more than to your family… you might be a Calvinist.

If you get irritated when you visit a Christian bookstore and ask where they keep the books on deeper theology and they point you to the Joel Osteen section… you might just be a Calvinist.

If you find yourself wanting to read your Bible instead of watching television… you might be a Calvinist.

If quotes from Pink, Spurgeon, Luther, Piper, and McArthur pop into your head at random times during the day …you might be a Calvinist.

If you can barely contain your laughter when someone refers to Joyce Meyer as a “minister”… you might just be a Calvinist.

If you are confused when someone uses the term “my Bible” as if they only have one…you might be a Calvinist.

If your Bibles must be replaced in less than a year due to pages separating from the spine…you might be a Calvinist.

If you smile, nod and hold your tongue with your teeth after a lively church service when someone says, “God showed up today”… you might be a Calvinist.

If you’ve ever shouted “YES!” when the pastor says to turn to 1st Thessalonians…you might be a Calvinist.

If you see 6:37 on a digital clock and think of the Lord Jesus’ words in John… you might be a Calvinist.

If you’ve muted a Thanksgiving football game because it’s interfering with your family discussion of Ephesians 1… you might be a Calvinist.

If you havebookmarked three or more preachers’ scripture index webpages… you might be a Calvinist.

If you’ve ever been banned from a Sunday School class for quoting scripture… you might be a Calvinist.

If you have ever purposefully sung a different word in a hymn to conform to scripture… you might be a Calvinist.

If your kids own more Bibles than televisions… you might be a Calvinist.

If your children never ask you “Where are we going?” on Sunday morning, Sunday night, and Wednesday night… you might be a Calvinist.

If you’ve ever read parts of “The Bondage of the Will” to children under ten and prayed that it would change their lives… you might be a Calvinist.

If your children argue and you require them to listen to a Piper Sermon as punishment… you might be a Calvinist.

If you visit spurgeon.org, desiringgod.org, and gty.org, more than once a day, yep… you guessed it… YOU, my dear friend, might just be a Calvinist!!

SOLI DEO GLORIA!

HT: Twisted Crown of Thorns

30 comments on “You might be a Calvinist . . .

  1. Dude! I might be a Calvinist! These two, in particular, resonated with me:

    If you’ve ever wanted to attend a Benny Hinn crusade just so you could stand up and shout “Ichabod!!”… you might just be a Calvinist.

    and

    If you have ever purposefully sung a different word in a hymn to conform to scripture… you might be a Calvinist.

  2. Wow I’m a calvanist…..it sound good to me!
    Sorry if I come off retarted…what exactly is calvinisim??

  3. Calvinism is a construct of theological statements drafted up in the 16th century as a rebuttal to some mistaken folks who brought a charge against the church, alleging five points of subtle semi-Pelagian (man- centered) “truths” they wanted adapted. The Council of Dort was convened to hear these charges and drafted up what we know as the TULIP to codify biblical Truths that stood against the Arminian remonstrance. The TULIP does not represent all of John Calvin’s teachings, but it is the sub-set of Reformed theology known as Calvinism.

    Here’s a guide and concise overview of the TULIP: http://www.gospeloutreach.net/tulip.html

  4. I love each one of these. Thank you very much for the ( http://www.gospeloutreach.net/tulip.html ) link.

  5. Thank you brother manfred. Thanks for your help and knowledge that God has bless you with.

  6. bigmike,

    Many thanks for your kindness and encouragement. Grow not weary in well doing …

    My pleasure, preacher12. Proclaim the Gospel to those on your side of the pond – we will be arm-in-arm for eternity.

  7. If you know what Spurgeon actually meant in context when he said “Calvinism is the Gospel…”, and you can explain it to complaining Arminians, semi-Pelagians, etc., you might be a Calvinist.

    In Christ,
    CD

  8. I have a question, and again please forgive me for my little(but growing) knowlage of our Savior, but if me being a sinner yet saved by my faith (I believe Jesus is God and took my punishment I deserve) am I still totally deprived?

  9. bigmike, Please keep asking such questions – they are important and beneficial. Being born again by the will of God (John 1:12 – 13) via faith in Christ by His grace (Ephesians chapter 2 – all of it) one is made a new creature (2 Cor 5:17). This does free us from the effect of sin while we yet dwell in these bodies of flesh (Romans chapter 7) but we can have confidence in Christ, knowing He has saved us and will save us until the Day of Judgment. Daily we sin, daily we repent and fix our hope on Christ, Who was without sin and stood in our place, taking the wrath of God due us.

  10. bigmike,

    Please work through this excellent and free resource step-by-step with an open Bible. Pray that God would grant you wisdom (James 1:5), read your Bible at least daily (starting in the book of John is good), obey what you find there, and find and join a church that is led by a plurality of elders where the Word is faithfully believed, proclaimed, taught, and practiced (albeit haltingly for although we as believers are delivered from the power of sin, we are not yet delivered from its presence).

    May you grow in the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ.

    In Him,
    CD

  11. Thanks brothers. God bless you!!!!

  12. Well, outside of Pink, mostly the people quoted here are Baptists, or, Spurgeonbob Squarepants…, hyper-Spurgeonists (and I LOVE Spurgeon!), and Fullerites… Calvinists, well, may be… I read the Institutes a few times and read Calvin and how Calvin conducted the affairs of the Gospel. But, then again, MOST PEOPLE quoted here will label me HYPER-CALVINSIT anyway. My labels to them at least are funnier and less offensive…

  13. Bigmike,

    I’m with Manfred and CD on this one as well. We are totally depraved and our salvation through faith alone doesn’t remove our depravity, we are only now not judged on our depravity (i.e. in the form of our endless sins committed). So we are born depraved and die depraved…but praise God we have Jesus Christ who has already paid the price for all those sins and now we are justified, redeemed, cleaned, reconciled, waiting to be glorified in the kingdom with our savior.

    abidingthroughgrace

  14. I was wondering how some of the mature brothers here, who understand and have been personal recipients of the doctrine of grace, stay away from the trappings that come with using a man’s name to title themselves. I know that some Godly men of old (ie Spurgeon, Edwards) used these labels too and they are practical when discussing theology, but where do you view the “cut off” line of being practical and being carnal in light of Paul’s instructions here?

    For ye are yet carnal: for whereas there is among you envying, and strife, and divisions, are ye not carnal, and walk as men? For while one saith, I am of Paul; and another, I am of Apollos; are ye not carnal? 1Corinthians 3:3-4 KJV

    In Christ – Jim

  15. These two hit me:
    If quotes from Pink, Spurgeon, Luther, Piper, and McArthur make up 90% of your Facebook statuses…you might be a Calvinist.

    If you have adjusted the default passage setting at http://www.biblegateway.org from “NIV” to “ESV” … you might be a Calvinist.

    My Bible Gateway setting is actually NASB, but that’s only because I’ve used that version for over 12 years and don’t want to switch.

  16. Jim (fleebabylon),

    Great question, you make a really great point in where the line is. I don’t think the name ‘calvinism’ counts because it isn’t really about John Calvin, but just short hand nickname for a whole gigantic system of doctrines based on the soveriegnty of God and the whole doctrines of grace. I would venture to say that the vast majority of people who claim to be calvinists are not followers of Calvin in the way Paul means in the passage you quoted…we are not following a man as in the case of Corinth, but agreeing to a doctrinal interpretation system.

    For others, we do walk that fine line of “well I follow Spurgeon and I’m of MacArthur, but he is of yada yada.” I pray that these allegiances never come close to our allegiance to Christ. Personally, I love love love Spurgeon, but I love his teaching because he points me to Christ with such gusto and passion and it makes mr lobe Christ more. So, I confidently say I am of Christ and my pastor CH Sprugeon teaches me to love him more. And my pastor MacArthur teaches me to get the most out of scripture so I can know Christ better.

    I pray we never put the men before our savior. Thanks for the challenge, thanks for the question, and thanks for making me think.

    By the way, this line can be crossed just the same when doctrines take the place of Christ…whether Calvinism, charasmatic, family integrated church, or end times. I pray that these do not become idols either.

    Faithfully abiding,

    Atg

  17. That proves it, I’m a Calvinist!!

  18. If quotes from Pink, Spurgeon, Luther, Piper, and McArthur make up 90% of your Facebook statuses…you might be a Calvinist

    Hahaha! Thank you, this one stuck out the most. I retweet Piper and MacArthur as well as some others, most of these post are true about me. I don’t label myself a Calvinist, however I don’t disagree with the doctrines of grace :)

  19. lol, I can’t even say how many times this has happened to me … lol …
    If you see 6:37 on a digital clock and think of the Lord Jesus’ words in John… you might be a Calvinist.

    … or with 6:44 or 6:45 …. talk about having the Word written on your heart … ;)

  20. I am truly not sure where I stand on this issue….(Calvinism). I have wondered and debated with myself about it. One question I have is what about 1 timothy 2:4? Maybe this has been addressed in another post, but I am unsure where! :) I would love any help/explanation! Thank-you!!! :)

  21. Katy – as with ALL Bible interpretation, the key is to “Never Read a Bible Verse!” http://www.str.org/site/News2?page=NewsArticle&id=5466

    Context is essential! So with this verse, perhaps one of these explanations would be helpful:

    http://www.reformationtheology.com/2009/04/understanding_1_timothy_24_by.php
    http://www.the-highway.com/1Tim2.4.html
    http://www.aomin.org/aoblog/index.php?itemid=3018

  22. I was trying to read it in context and I read their arguments and see what they are saying….it just still makes me question a bit…I wish I had a firm belief one way or the other. Thank you, Manfred!

  23. Katy – we should never get to a place where we refuse to examine ourselves and what we believe. So asking questions about passages that trouble people over the years is a GOOD thing! We all ought to look into such things from time-to-time or we might slide into error, or worse, as some have done.

  24. Thank-you….thank-you!!!! :)
    I appreciate that encouragement! :)

  25. If your blog has 115 entries under the Paul Washer category and only 77 under the Sola Scriptura category… you might be a Calvinist.

  26. Hahaha…I have reread this post now and laughed at how many were spot-on for me too! So, so funny! I am definitely a true believer in the Doctrines of Grace! :o)

  27. Good, but John Piper does contemplative prayer!

  28. Haha last night at a Bible study we were singing Jesus, lover of my soul and at the line “I will never let you go” I was extremely convicted, knowing that on my own I would always let him go. He will never let me go(John 6:37-40), so thats what I changed it to in my little corner haha. Good list!

  29. I totally agree with several of these However, I’m definitely NOT a Calvinist. I don’t believe in the TULIP theory. I don’t believe that there are only a few that are chosen to be saved. That seems to be a slap in God’s face in regards to his sacrifice. John 3:16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. 17 For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved.

    So that who might be saved? The Elect? NO! But that the WORLD through HIM might be SAVED. Some say that the elect are those who God chose to save. If that is the case then the rest were chosen to go to Hell. Is this accurate in comparison to the above scripture? No, it’s not. Does everyone in the world accept Christ as Savior? Unfortunately, no.

    In Christ Jesus,
    Jamie

  30. Jamie – you have fallen for the post-modern interpretation of John 3:16. I shant try to convince you otherwise, but simply use your words in response: Your view that Christ died for the world (by that meaning the WORLD) while most everyone is hell bound means the Jesus in your theology is a very poor savior – He tries, but He just can’t save everyone He wishes to save. That is a slap in the face of the one true God.

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